The mind tricking impulsivity
Impulsivity. This fucker.
Let’s say impulsivity is a game card, well I’m telling you right now, he’s the joker. He can be funny as fuck and powerful in some games, but in others, he either isn’t even counted in the game or he’s worth nothing or you’re rolling your eyes when you see you have it. Impulsivity is tricky, just like the joker.
When do you know you feel impulsive?
Whenever I feel impulsive, it’s like a little adrenaline rush running through my brain telling me to do what I’m about to do. I’m an overthinker okay? I always like (obsess) with planning ahead in a way that I’ll know every potential outcome or consequences to x action, but when this joker comes running in my brain control base, I lose it. Fuck the consequences, fuck the outcome, it’ll happen because I decided so. I’m really into the go with the flow but I think that you have to think rationally too and think about your actions, what they might do to your future self or to the people around you. When feeling impulsive, I stop rationalizing. The rush, as I was saying, can be felt through different feelings. For example, you can be in the burst of a happy moment and just tell yourself fuck it I’ll buy this handbag I have one life to live and it makes me feel good right now, I’ll feel even better after, anyways money comes back eh? Then you buy the handbag that was obviously too expensive for your account and then you end up not having enough money for things that were necessary or you just feel anxious the day after because you know deep down that rationally, it wasn’t THE best choice.
For my anger issues people out there, you’ll probably recognise yourself through this example. Let’s say you’re in a bad place with your boyfriend/girlfriend okay and right now you’re hanging out with one of your friend and you’re talking about this situation, telling the story of what happened and you’re making the scene, it’s like a total play now and you thought you already had let this go but now that you’re talking about it and your friend is hyping you up you’re getting more and more frustrated and then without you even knowing, the joker has already taken charge of your brain control base ten minutes ago. You thought you were in peace with the situation but now you’ve already sent your rude angry ass text message because you’re mad at them. But they didn’t do nothing at this exact precise moment, you just were acting under anger impulsive.
You know, the joker plays, it’s what he does. Impulsivity does the same and it doesn’t mind tricking your brain.
Why is it tricky to be impulsive?
Earlier, I shared negative outcomes from impulsivity, but it’s not always bad, and that is exactly why it’s tricky. You have to know the difference between the moments when you need the joker and the moments when he’s just tricking you. The moments when you need him, are the ones where you get in front of an out of your comfort zone opportunity and taking this little or big chance will either change your life forever or for the day. These are the moments you need in life, the ones when you completely live by what you deep down want and experience new things, things that’ll make you feel alive, that’ll make you feel like time is stopping and there’s nothing else around, things that’ll stay in your brain forever. Take that leap of faith, take the joker’s hand and my man will get you someplace you never thought you would be OR places you always dreamed to be at. Usually, this good impulsivity is about big decisions but sometimes, small ones will change your whole day too.
The trick itself is your blind eye. You know when you look at the bigger picture you can always see things you couldn’t when your nose was stuck at 1 mm from the picture? Yea this is it. If impulsivity is the joker, let’s say rationality is the Ace of whatever you want let’s take Ace of spade. Now you know in most of the card games, the Ace is the strongest, however, there are some where the ace doesn’t need to be there because he’s useless. Or again, you roll your eyes when you see you have one. Well rationality is important most days and in most of our decisions, but there are moment when you don’t need this guy.
When you’re feeling impulsive, rationality mostly always goes away you don’t think about it and hey like I said, sometimes it is MUCH needed, but sometimes, girl think again. It literally becomes your blind eye, you can’t see it and it is risky. Like when you’re about to buy something incredibly out of your budget or trust someone after having a couple drinks only. You need your Ace of spades in those moments because you could regret a lot the next day, but it’s not always needed.
Is impulsivity good or bad?
Like I said, it’s tricky. Use your logic it could be good in a situation and bad in another. If it’s a pattern like every two weeks when you get your pay you decide to spend half of it on shit you don’t need, it’s now a pattern but it’s not a good one cause you’re not keeping enough money so you have to rationalize here. However, if when you get your pay one day and decide, ugh I’ve had a long ass ugly fucking week I’ll take myself to dinner in my favorite fancy restaurant this one time instead of eating at home, then yes girl get cute and go to your favorite fucking fancy restaurant. You need & deserve it! It’s a good impulsivity because it will make you feel better without having bad consequences after.
How to be less impulsive?
- Get yourself a paper and a pen (or notes in your phone) and write down every time you’ve felt impulsive lately. You can add things as the days go by. Also write how you felt on the moment of doing this impulsive thing and how you felt about it the day or days after, what happened right before you started feeling this way?
- Realise that some of them are patterns that need to be dosed or cut down if they only make you happy short terms and ALWAYS make you feel like shit days after. Understand that you need to work on it.
- When the joker rush comes in, please take a step back and ask yourself these questions:
- Did I do something similar lately that I regretted?
- Will this action impact badly someone’s life or feelings?Will this action make me feel better about me in a few days? Or will I only feel happy on the moment?Is this rational?
- If yes, do I think it’s rational only because I’m telling myself I have one life and I’ll start to change this pattern next week? Did I step out to see the bigger picture or am I only saying yes because I, right now, really really want to do this?If no, is it something that scares me? That will put me out of my comfort zone? If yes, do it. If not, think about it again, if you see it’s not rational don’t do it, but if you say it’s not rational as an excuse, maybe you need to step out of your comfort zone a little.
- When feeling impulsive, you can meditate or do something else to take your mind off of it. Sometimes we’re acting a certain way because we let our emotions take control and then either regret or be there wondering why the hell you reacted this way when it’s not that big of a deal.
- Will doing this make you the person you want to become or aspire to be?
- What could be the consequences of this action? Long term talking.
I’ve been impulsive my whole life, speaking my mind, saying stupid jokes, acting out like a fucking immature little kid, spending big amounts, etc. I learned and work on this almost everyday and it’s now behind me. Although sometimes I do grab the joker’s hand and end up having one hell of an experience. It’s brought me a lot, as much learning lessons as stories to tell.
Impulsivity can bring a lot of positive or negative in your life, it’s a trick. Will you fall for it in the wrong times? Or will you take the leap of faith of your life in the right times? Only you can decide.
But hey, what about it?
Babye loves,
