Look, this is my truthful opinion, if you don’t like it you’re absolutely welcome to leave a comment about yours, I want to know what you think and maybe you’ll give me some output. Anyways, let’s start…
We’ve all seen the quotes on internet about exes, soooo many, I mean let’s be real people are fucking creative these days. So many opinions and what should you actually do? What’s the right thing? I’ll say it right now so you’re not too disappointed, there is no ‘’right’’ road, there’s only the road. There is no specific way to go through any situation with an ex, you act and take the decisions you want to take. Getting back with an ex is a lot of things, but first, it’s a decision.
Reasons you should go back with your ex
I’ll keep this briefly because there’s not a lot lol.
- Unfinished business
I’ve been there, I’ve gotten back with an ex once and then the relationship was much healthier than the first one, he did become an ex again though, so maybe not recommend. However, if there’s one thing I fucking learned over the years, is if you don’t have the switch up in your head, the little click, you’ll want to go back.
Feeling like your story together is unfinished is a good reason to go back there, because you’ll need to learn and face the facts that it either won’t work again or ever for that matter OR be with someone that makes your heart full. You do have got to be fucking aware that it might not work and you might get hurt.
If you really really want to try it and feel it deep down that it’s the decision you have to take then take it. What needs to happen will happen.
- The exception
There are so many couples out there that don’t work out the first time then they get back together et just never separates again. It happens, but it’s still rare and you need distance and time and communication; if both parties are not willing to make the necessary efforts, it won’t work. That’s for every couple though.
I’m just saying, have you seen the movie He’s just not that into you? The exception is real, you are the exception to someone as much as someone will be your exception in this world. Exceptions are everywhere, well getting back with an ex and it actually working is exceptional; that’s not everybody’s love story.
Those are my only points.
Reasons you shouldn’t get back with your ex
Ok now with the real point of this.
The real manuscript.
REAL TERMS.
- There’s a fucking reason they’re an ex
Maybe you did the wrong, maybe they did, maybe you both hurt each other, whoever did whatever, there’s a fucking reason you once decided to let this go and this reason shouldn’t be erased with time. I mean yea people change but it doesn’t mean they will and if they do it doesn’t mean that new version of them will truly work out with the new version of YOU.
I get that there were good times, but it doesn’t mean the bad times can be forgotten. Keep that reason up to date, I don’t give a single fuck if the situation was exceptional BLABLABLA shut up and move on to another chapter.
- Respect.
If there were any kind of disrespect in the relationship, it’s not worth going back. If one day someone doesn’t respect you and shows it to you in their actions, the day that they actually will respect you is never going to come.
You don’t earn someone’s respect the first moment you lock eyes with them. Someone starts to respect you because of what they see in you, they respect you by looking at your actions and evaluating how much they align with their values and what they see in their own selves. The moment they don’t respect you, they probably never will and will keep putting you down by this lack of respect. Respect is you being on your own pedestal because you fucking put yourself there. Respect by someone else is them looking at you where you put yourself, not less.
If respect is not in the room with us, then there shouldn’t be an ‘’us’’.
- SETTLING DOWN IS NOT THE WAY
Maybe you’re thinking you’ll never find someone as good as them, I assure you that’s not true. This person may have been the most perfect on paper but if they’re not your person, then they’re not your person. You shouldn’t be settling down because you think you can’t get anyone else or because you think they’re the only ones that get you. It’s time you start getting yourself. Connect with you and learn to read you the way you could read them. The more you do that, the less you’ll want to settle down.
- Fresh start
You don’t watch the same TV show again & again for the surprise. Nahnahnah, you watch a TV show again & again just so you can have the comfort of knowing, the satisfaction of knowing the whole thing until you start a new show that you immediately love (or progressively) and then obsess over.
Do you get what I’m trying to say? Get out of the comfort zone, especially if it includes your ex. Start fresh and maybe find a new comfort serie.
- Focus on you gorgeous
It’s the best gift you could put in your life. A blessing you put in your own road.
Getting over a breakup the times I felt at my worst and missed my relationship most were the ones when I wasn’t taking care of me enough. Don’t get me wrong, you will be missing that person which is normal because you loved them. You won’t be able to replace someone because we all bring a different tint of color in each other’s lives, BUT, you will be able to grow out of this and start loving new things & people again. Let yourself do so. Until then, focus on you.
- More memories to come
If you had a hard time detaching because of the memories, just think how hard this will be after trying again. You’ll have made new memories, new moments, new days & nights of intimacy again, basically you’ll just be restarting the healing process again. Think twice before you put yourself through something this painful.
- Everything happens for a reason
Like I said in point 1, you separated for a reason, but you also got hurt for a reason, someone got out of your life for a reason. Let the reason just be and then let new reasons come into your life. You may not understand why it happened the way it did, but you will one day.
- Some pains are inevitable
Lastly, pain.
You need to learn, grow, get stronger, etc.
Something I read a few years back was someone saying ‘’sometimes, life (or God whoever you have faith in) gives you a signal that someone isn’t right and if you ignore it, they’ll let that someone hurt you until you’re done being hurt by them’’. It may not be true but I sincerely believe in it. You were hurt by that person and that’s a lesson, but you can choose if you want to let them get this chance again or not.
Going back to your ex is, again, your decision, I don’t regret taking it because it needed to happen. It didn’t last though, and rare are the ones that do. Don’t let someone hurt you that much, holding on to a person because you have many memories with them isn’t a big enough reason to go back. Let things the way they happened, learn from it and move on. Although I know it’s an easy thing to say, that’s why I can’t tell you what to do.
You do you darlin, just do you well.
Mwah
